Happy Birthday Adiah!

This time last year, I was getting ready to go to my billionth OB appointment. 

I was hoping and praying for the arrival of Adiah. 

My worst fear was being in the hospital for Christmas. 

I had been walking around dilated to 5cm for two weeks and nothing seemed to be progressing. 

I had given up on him EVER coming out. My parents and sister had arrived at my house late the night before and were going to stay home with Audra. As I kissed Audra bye and told my parents a few things that needed to be done, I had no idea that the next time I set foot into my house 

I would be bringing home Adiah in my arms.

Ryan and I talked on the way to the doctors office about what we thought would happen. 

The doctor would check me, tell me I am not progressing, and see you next week, like usual. He checked me and I had effaced about 50%. He told me to go walk around the mall and come back in a few hours and if there was any change at all they would admit me in the hospital. 

I called my mom and let her know the plan. 

As we walked out of the office, the first hard contraction hit and I had to stop walking. 

I chalked it up to nothing more than a normal false labor pain. 

Ryan and I went and grabbed lunch and I had a few more, but nothing really regular. Then we went to the mall and I had to start stopping a lot. 

We headed back to the doctors. I was getting very uncomfortable. 

As we walked into the office in the back of my head though, I felt like this might be it and I got really scared. Maybe Im an aweful person, but I was seriously scared of having my second child.

 What if I didn't love him as much as I loved Audra? What if it was different? I mean I just didn't see how I could ever love another as much as I loved Audra. It scared me to death. I knew I loved him already, but what if I didn't love him the same amount? 

The worrying came to a stop quickly though, because I started having to think about breathing. 

I was sitting in a room with a whole lot of pregnant woman, and I was seriously swaying back and forth and breathing through contractions, trying not to moan. I didn't want to freak any of them out, I mean they themselves would be experiencing it soon enough. 

My nurse came out and took one look at me and said, "OK you need to go to the hospital. You are going to have that baby today!" She hugged me and I am pretty sure I started hyperventilating. 

I had no choice now other than to have this baby (not that I really had a choice anyways). 

I called my mom and dad and we headed to the hospital. 

I got to the hospital at about 3 PM and I had Adiah at 6:57 PM. 

It was fast, but I seriously think it is funny how worried I was about loving him the same.

I can't explain it, but your heart literally grows and you can love even more than you thought possible! 

He was perfect and beautiful! 

I am so thankful for my little man. 

This year has been so wonderful. Adiah has been pure Joy and Light for our family. 

I am so excited for this next year and to watch him to continue to grow and form his little personality. 

God has been so good to us. 

Happy First Birthday Adiah! 

We love you so much! 

Thank you for teaching each one of us to love more.

You are the sweetest!

Adiah's 11th Monthday!

Eleven Months was a very big month for bubbie.

He went from cruising furniture to full fledge walking!

Ryan has been traveling for medical school these past few months.

He was SO worried he was going to miss his first steps. 

Well we had one weekend together up in Canada arranged by his parents. 

It was seriously such a blessing. 

The night before we flew out to meet Ryan I had a dream of Adiah walking to Ryan at Niagara Falls. 

I laughed and told Ryan's dad the next morning and said how perfect it would be. 

Well The first night in the hotel in Canada, wall to wall window room, overlooking Niagara Falls, Adiah took six steps out of Ryan's hands to the bed. 

Pretty much AWESOME! 

We all clapped and laughed. 

It was PERFECT! 

Thank you Adiah for waiting until we were with Daddy, but If you decide to go back to crawling I wouldn't mind. Now that you are running and climbing everything. lol Oh you are funny and  hand full, but very much loved!!!! 

First's this month:

Two front top teeth came in

Walked/first steps

Went into a different country (Canada)

Saw Niagara Falls

First plane ride

We love you, Adiah and are SO thankful for you in our life! One more month and you are going to be my big one year old. It's crazy to think. You are such a precious baby. 

Thank you LORD for giving us him! 

Happy 11th Monthday!!!

Pumpkins Galore!

These past few weeks have been tiring and hard. 

With Ryan traveling all the time, I can honestly say it's been hard to get into the holiday spirit. 

BUT when Ryan was scheduled to be home for a weekend we had to load it up with all our traditions and It was seriously the most fun I have had in a long time. 

We made our way to the pumpkin patch, roasted marshmallows, painted and carved our yearly Jack-o-Lantern, Ryan and I caught up on all this season episodes of Modern Family, snuggled, cuddled, and just enjoyed being together as a family. 

It was a fresh breath of air. 

 Audra's true feelings about her brother comes out!

 My little farmer

 First Hay Ride!

 Im so happy Mom! 

 I love painting myself... I mean pumpkins!

Painted pumpkins 2012

and that was our fun family weekend! 

Hope everyone else is having an excellent time kicking off their Autumn!

Adiah's 10th Monthday!

We are in the double digits! WOW!

Ten whole months this little guy has graced us here on earth.

He has changed our lives completely.

Our whole family is pretty smitten.

Adiah is doing so many new things.

Walking seems to be right around the corner. 

He is so close, it's scary. 

He is already "demolition derby" on two hands and knees. 

I can't imagine how quick I am going to have to be when he starts to walk/run.

Adiah LOVES cars/trucks/ anything with wheels. 

Boys are just born with an innate nature to be drawn to them. 

We don't have any boy specific toys in our house, yet.

We went over to a friends house who has two little boys and have cars. 

Adiah went to them and started making "Vmmmmm" "Vmmmm" while pushing them around.

We have NEVER done that. He just knew and did it! 

Well ,we didn't have any cars at the house so he would get our remote control and push it on the floor like a car and go "Vmmmm". 

I know, I know. I felt horrible, He needed a toy car.

 We were over at one of my best friends house who has two little boys as well.

 One of them LOVES cars as well. 

So you can imagine Adiah was in heaven when he saw all of them to play with.

I told her the story of the remote, and we both laughed. 

Her little boy Ezzy, which is my adopted nephew and utterly adorable, decided to give Adiah one of his toy cars when we were leaving.

 It was SOOO sweet. 

Adiah fell asleep in the car holding it on our way home. 

So he now has his first car (Thanks Kim and Ezzy, I owe you one)!

Firsts this month:

Visited Dad in Houston

Says "Du" for his toy duck in the bath

went to his first pumpkin patch

rode his first hay ride

painted his first pumpkin

got his first car

Happy 10th Monthday Sweet Boy! 

Adiah's 9th Monthday!

We have a little comedian on our hands,

he THRIVES on laughter. 

When he does something that makes a person laugh, he will do it over and over. 

Ryan's family came up and we were at lunch and Adiah does this adorable scrunching of his little features. Well, of course everyone laughed. 

So he took it upon himself to do it over and over again. 

It was so funny.

I love how his little personality is starting to take shape. 

He is pretty laid back and easy going. 

One of the most recent additions to his cuteness is when Ryan gets home from work and Adiah spots him he immediately stops what he is doing and crawls to him. He pulls up on Ryan's legs giggling and laughing waiting to be picked up. They then hug.
Talk about heart melting!!

Of course Ryan feels on top of the world because of this.
I can already tell they are going to be buddies. 

He got his two bottom front teeth this month. 

He was fussy a bit because of his gums hurting, but on account I just had a wisdom tooth

That broke through, I know how irritating it feels.

 I think he did a great job dealing with the discomfort. 

Now only 18 more teeth to go... poor little guy. 

Overall, this has been such an awesome month.
Three-fourths of the way to the big ONE!
Bring on month 10!!!

Firsts this month:

cruising the furniture

letting go of furniture and balancing a few seconds

Got his first tooth 

got his first hair cut

says "daw" for dog

 Watch out ladies! Little Casanova is on the loose!

Happy 9th Monthday! We love you Bubbie!!!

Oh How I Love Autumn

Autumn is HERE in this household! 

Thankfully Texas has been pretty accommodating and even making it feel Fall-ish. 

It's been pretty cool weather. 

Which means there has been:

 Lots of evening bike rides and outside playtime with friends.

Lots of warm drinks and lots of snuggly clothes.

The best part is putting up our few fall decorations.

It really puts me in good spirits. 

When Ryan came home from work 

I met him excitedly announcing autumn is here, look I decorated.

He said he had been wondering when I was going to do it, 

and that he had expected me to have them up weeks ago. 

So he knows me pretty well. :)

Today we made our scarecrow. 

We made him two years ago and Audra LOVED him. 

We didn't get to make him last year because I was pregnant and busy helping with my sisters wedding. 

So I promised Audra we would make him this year. 

So today we busted him out and stuffed him. 

It was a blast and Audra is thoroughly pleased! 

Here he is! 

What have you been doing in the spirit of Autumn? 

His Hands

 I lay in my bed, quietly willing sleep to take over my body.

 One hour (come on body rest) ... two hours (only three more hours before you will be nursing).... finally sweet darkness.

Then an hour later, up tossing and turning, drifting in and out of somewhat a sleep state.

Adiah begins to cry. I go get him and nurse him back to sleep. 

I slowly walk back and get in bed, eyes wide open. 

*click, click, click, click*

Thank you Jesus, Ryan is home. 

He comes in wasted (and by wasted I mean drop dead tired from his night shift). 

We talk for a bit, but he crawls into bed and puts his arms around me and I instantly feel secure and safe and drift peacefully into sleep for the last two hours before my day has to begin. 

When I hear Adiah again, I longingly wish I could stay in his arms and sleep peacefully next to him.

I take his hand off my waist and tuck him back in. I kiss his forehead and close the door to begin my day. 

Night shifts as a med student are the worst. He hates them and they leave me disoriented and a lot of times, lonely. During the night, he is gone. During the day, although his presence is felt, he is soundly sleeping to recoup and do it all again. 

I try and fill my time with some outings, but at night I feel the loneliest.  

It is crazy to me how much I feel complete when he is near. 

Just his hand across my waist can ease me to blissful rest. 

 It makes perfect sense though, those are the hands that work hard each day for our family, those are the hands that hold our children, those are the hands that he held mine at the altar over five years ago as he said, "I do". Those hands give me protection and I love them... I love him. 

I am thankful to God for him.

This is a small section of time with schedules like this in the grand scheme of things. 

That I am most grateful for.

A Beautiful Cool Morning

A cold front blew in this fine September morning and

It actually felt like Autumn!

That meant we actually went outside and wasn't sweating in two seconds.

We even had to bust out a hat for Adiah because of the wind. Score!

Audra and Adiah played out front. 

I got some much needed weeding in the garden done.

It was a great start of the day.

It is already climbing up in temperature, but this morning was a nice little break

and it just makes me want Fall weather to get here and stay even more!

COME QUICKLY COOL WEATHER!!!

My little Fashionista!  

Helping me Garden

 

Sweetness!!!

Have a great Saturday!

Book Clubs Are Where It's At!

Sometimes life is just cool! 

Like tonight at our book club. The awesome book club I have talked about here.

The lovely Mary hosted this month.

She set up a skype date with the author of Edenbrooke, Julianne Donaldson. 

She was seriously so sweet and down to earth.

 It was so cool to hear her thoughts about her book.

Hear about her struggles and how she balances being a mom, wife, and writing. 

She is one of those people you just want to get to know and who makes you feel at ease. 

Makes me even more excited about her book, because she is just the type of person I want to support. 

All the talking of Edenbrooke brought back all the happy feelings and thoughts.

 Basically, it made me want to go re-read her book. 

Since it has been a month or so, I think I will. 

If you haven't read it yet. You should! 

If you aren't completely sold check out my review here and get on it! 

You won't be sorry. 

We took a fun picture at the end of the session

Thank you so much Julianne! Can't wait until Blackmoore comes out!

Like I have said before, if you love books get into a book club or start one.

 It takes reading to a whole new level.

A Birthday Letter to My Baby Girl

Dear Sweet Audra Leigh,

It seems just a few months ago, I was looking at a positive pregnancy test. I was scared, excited, nervous, an emotional roller coaster thinking of how life was about to change.

The first time I saw you on the sonogram screen... I was overwhelmed with happiness and I cried. I loved you instantly more than I can explain. I was full of joy about this little gift beginning to grow inside me. I remember you moving inside me. You were so active and strong. I couldn't wait to meet you, hold you, cuddle you.

I read to you and sang every night while you were inside me. I cherished those times when it was just you and I. Then the day came you entered into the world. The love I had for you grew a million times. I sang to you when they laid you on my chest and I cried... again. I kissed you and I thanked God that you were perfect. You were beautiful. You were mine.

Today as it marks your fifth birthday I am excited for you, but at the same time sad at how quickly these years have flown. I don't want to forget any moment of your childhood. I am constantly taking what you like to call "click" moments. I take the mental pictures and burn them to my heart.

You take your first step. "click"

You say your first word. "click"

You look at me and smile saying I'm the best mommy you ever had just because. "click"

You turn to me and say how much you love me. "click"

You tell me you will always have dates with me and always live with me. "click"

You play with your brother and make him happy when he was crying. "click"

You dance around care free and happily to Taylor Swift. "click"

You tell me I'm the best mother in the world. "click"

You sleep soundly in your bed, surrounded by a hundred books and stuffed animals. "click"

I have clicked a thousand moments, and hold them close. I love the glimpse of innocent perspective that you have of life. The pureness of your heart. As you grow you and I may not always see eye to eye on everything. In fact sometimes you will think I am overprotective, but that is OK and I don't mind, because I want you to enjoy your childhood, enjoy the innocence, enjoy the sheltered view of the world. The pressures and worries of this life will be on your shoulders before you want them to be. I know we won't be able to always protect you. One day you will have to spread your wings and make your own decisions,  which is a part of growing up and discovering who you are as an individual, but for now we will.

You are my pride and joy. You are my baby girl, my monkey moo, my sunshine. I treasure these past years and the little sweet girl you have become. I know that the future holds great things for you. God has made you for a special purpose. Seek it wholeheartedly. You are going to take this world by fire.

Always keep your passion and tender heart.
Always be confident in who you are.
Always keep your love for learning and knowledge.

Always share your humor.

Always stand firm in your beliefs.

And as you say, "No matter what, Always trust God."

Happy Birthday! I love you, baby! You light up my life. You are one of the biggest blessings in my life and couldn't be more proud of you. 

Always and Forever,

Mommy

Picture taken by J. Noel Photography

Adiah's 8th Monthday!

Since we are on the road right now and we can't carry around the glider.
 I thought it fitting his 8 month picture to be in a suit case.
It's his favorite thing to play in right now any way!

Mr. Adiah, Mr. Adiah, How did you get so big?

You are supposed to be my little baby, but now you're 8 Months old!

You have done so many exciting new things this month. 

A light went on and you are exploring, learning, and doing something different almost every day.

I love you so much. Continue to grow and share your sweet smile big boy! 

First's this month:

Went on your first family vacation to the beach

Had first family pictures

Said "mama" and what sounded like "I love mama" (I'm taking it as he knew what he was saying it)

Started getting up on all fours and rocking

Went from rocking to what we call the worm crawl or land butterfly stroke

Can go from laying down to sitting no problem

Met his great grandmother and Great mimi and great papaw and a lot of other relatives

Visited another state (Arkansas and Missouri)
Rode to the top of Pinnacle Mountain on Daddy's back

Happy 8th Monthday Adiah!!!!!

Olympic Impact

I know this a week late, but Olympics are a very, very big deal to Ryan and I!

We don't watch very much TV in our house, but from the day of opening ceremonies to the closing the TV was on A LOT.... probably too much. We watched more TV in the two weeks then we had watched in the past year. Not Joking! But the thing is it only comes every four years and

 I did NOT want to miss one second.

This year was especially exciting because we got to share it with Audra. 

It was so awesome to watch the olympic magic come alive in her. 

She rooted for U.S.A. She fell in love with Missy Franklin and Gabby. 

She wants to go to the Olympics for gymnastics, swimming, and high dive. 

She has begun practicing her "floor routines" and "swimming strokes".

She is planning on going to the Olympics and I love seeing the determination and drive in her eyes.
It brought me back to what I wanted to do as a kid.
I can still remember watching Olympics when I was little. Watching the gymnastics and doing exactly what Audra was doing this year. If they were on past my bedtime sneaking out to the hall so I could watch crouched down. I had the feeling I could do anything when I was young.

I watched as new records were broken. Seeing the bodies of human beings meet crazy expectations and limits. The triumphant smiles and the tears from years of sacrifice finally paying off in one of the coveted medals. As I celebrated with them from my couch, I couldn't help but inspect myself.
It honestly made me feel inferior.

What have I done with my life?
How many goals have I actually completed that I set for myself?
Am I really doing something of worth?

I actually was somewhat depressed, but then as I was lost in the "what am I doing with my life questions" I was somewhat loudly interrupted by another "Watch this cartwheel, Mom" and "Was that a 10?" and I was reminded of what I am doing.

I may never get a trophy, or a medal, or a crowd cheering me on, but I am sacrificing the glory and self spotlight right now for something greater. I am raising two kids who are at the age of high demands and supporting a husband in Medical school. I am pouring my energy into them wholeheartedly so that later on I can say I have no regrets. That I can say I am using my time for them.
I may not be physically training for a medal, but I am training my children in the way of the Lord.
I may not get my name in lights, but I hope to hear "Well done my good and faithful servant".

Who knows, one day I may be able to use my time for something like Olympic training or meet my goal of a full marathon, but right now I am running my own type of marathon with my family.
A goal I WILL meet!

Audra's Wonderland: First week of 1st grade

My little girl is getting so big! Last year I started to pursue homeschooling Audra. I planned on just doing preschool, but quickly she took off with a hunger to learn anything and everything. 

Before I knew it we were done with Kindergarten. 

She is turning 5 in a week and just makes the cut off date to start Kinder, so I was hesitant to move forward to first grade. 

She is ready and wants to move on, and if there is anything I know for sure, it is not to let Audra get bored. 

That is when she can get into trouble and mischief fast!

I am really excited about this year. We have a lot of fun ahead of us. 

This first week, was a lot of review and fun. Audra was so excited to work in her new books.

I am looking forward to all the fun things planned.

 It helps that I have the best student in the world, well in my world. :)

A Place of Waiting

I have been convicted a lot lately about waiting. 

We have all heard or even said this little phrase that has been weighing on my mind. 

The little phrase of I can't wait until I grow up, I can't wait until I finish school, I can't wait until I get married, I can't wait for this to be over, I can't wait for ... you fill in the blank. 

Why do we wish to reach a point in life before we are there? 

Life is a journey with ups and downs, but that journey is God's tool to teach us lessons.

 Sometimes I feel like it is so easy to get focused on what is coming next that we miss the exciting experiences along the way.  The important experiences.

These past three years in medical school have seriously taught me a lot.
Sometimes honestly I have wished for this chapter in life to be closed.
Get on track for some type of normalcy.
Start making money.
 Have some type of known schedule.
Not having to spend countless days and nights manning down the fort by myself.
Ryan not  having bear the weight of constantly having to pass the next test,
impressing such and such doctor,
writing the perfect letter.
Majority of the time though, I have been happy and content where we are in life.
In fact, a lot of the time I feel like time is going WAY to fast.

This journey so far has taught me patience.
I have learned to be a better wife, mother, and friend, or at least I would like to think I have.
I have found joy and happiness in the little things in life.
I can honestly say I am blessed beyond measure.
Going through this has taught me to really appreciate the smallest things,
and even though it has been a challenging three years; it has been some of the best of my life.

I have watched my four year old grow and mature.
I gave birth to my son.
They both are my pure pride and joy.
I have watched my husband work hard and somehow balance being the best dad and husband.
I have watched the four of us grow into what I can call my "perfect" family.

So today as it marked the first day of Ryan's last year of medical school I am excited about the future, but I have enjoyed this place of waiting and journey.
I wouldn't wish these past three years to have gone any faster (Ryan probably has a different story).

This place of waiting is almost at a close. One more year, a fun year, full of exciting adventures and the end result Ryan will be a doctor and we will be on to a new place for his career.


I will wait though and continue to take in every day, hour, and second. I don't want to wish it away because this journey is what makes me, me. I don't want to miss any of it dwelling on the future when it will come fast enough. I want to experience the good and the bad whole heartedly.
So I am glad to wait.

Ryan's first day of his last year!